There are lots of things that I didn’t expect when taking on the challenge of being foster parents (that’s a whole other post though!).
Tonight an unexpected sadness came over me at a huge milestone that our little boy had. He came to us with very few words and very little communication skills. He didn’t really call anybody anything – he mostly pointed and yelled or cried to get what he wanted.
He’s been steadily adding words to his vocabulary, prompting lots of praise from us. Over the last few days though, he’s begun using my girls’ names (in his own unique pronunciation, but decidedly intelligible) and calling my husband and I “daddy” and “ma” or “mama”. That he is doing these things is so wonderful for his development. That he’s doing it with us instead of his biological family is heartbreaking.
Since the plan is for reunification, we’re still adding our names on to the end of the daddy and mama for him to have some sort of differentiation between his two families, but still. My heart hurts for his heart to have to have this distinction in his life.
I hope his time with us is restorative and gives his brain and heart a path to health and healing. I also wish that this healing could come without scars, but I know this is not the way it works. Still, it makes this mama’s heart hurt something fierce.